Although, to be fair to other third world cities, we *are*
scrapping the bottom of the third world barrel
Aka, perhaps this shit only happens in *this* city
# at the airport, immigration officials outdo each other to
be as rude to you as can be
# dogs roaming the streets like they own this shit
#mosquitos!
#finally! Good coverage of international news on t.v
(*on that note, fkc south Carolina and those in-bred kkk’s
(including those imported from n.carolina). its time to bring back the BPP.)
# you add cellphone ‘credit/minutes’ to your mobile phone in
order to buy internet ‘daily bundles’
-
This shit is slower than dial-up
-
You bought a weekly bundle once, which was used
up in a day, and never again
-
‘it swallowed my credit’ becomes a sentence that
makes sense
# your main phone network line works sporadically, hence you
have more than one phone number
*downloads fbmessenger, whatsapp, viber just to make sure
you have options*
# children less than three years old running around
barefoot, half-naked playing unsupervised (it’s a beautiful thing, these kids
are fearless)
# child labour (depressing)
# the lack of concern about child labour (frustrating)
# kids walking to and from school in their brand new
uniforms (uniforms are ugly, watching the kids enthusiasm brings a smile to my
face)
#women breastfeeding whenever and wherever (this should be
life)
#all adult women are seemingly always in three stages of
reproduction; either pregnant, or breastfeeding, or getting ready to be
pregnant.
#the fact that households leave covered pots of water with
cups outside their gates for passersby to have a cup of water on their onward
journey (little mercies)
# soldiers walking around with aka47s slung around their
shoulders is a ubiquitous sight
-
The fact that they are not as many as a few years
ago is a sign of progress
-
You can tell the ones who have been kitted out
with new guns since your last visit
-
You are impressed that the curfew is not being
enforced and the checkpoints are fewer
# you can be arrested arbitrarily, including for ‘talking
back/ badly’ #truestory
#your friends advice you to have on speed dial, the numbers
of a powerful person/someone with connections, a lawyer and a doctor, just in
case, for next time, if you ever do get arrested. *pause*
# you’ve ridden around in a truck full of soldiers, all the
while thinking wtf is this life
# half the country is at war but we party and bullshit in
the capital city
# an argument about politics is always about two minutes
ahead in any conversation
#everybody’s got answers but nobody is asking the right
questions
#”we liberated this country” is considered a valid way of
ending said political discussions, especially when it’s contrary to the status
quo/ way of thinking
# we all know national security is listening. We also know
they drive the cars without number plates
#knowing the dollar exchange rate at the black market, but
not the official rate
#this exchange rate tripled in the six months since you’ve
been here, yet we continue to soldier on
# majority live in poverty but huge SUVs are the main mode
of transport for a chosen few
#the moment you realize you and your grandkids will be
paying off the debts that were taken to buy said SUVs and accommodate people in
expensive hotels
#motorcycles/boda bodas are the main means of public
transportation for the rest of us
#nobody you know takes public transportation and wtf is
wrong with you? Hire a car
# drinking spiced tea under a tree while the tea lady and
her clients regale you with funny stories
#tea options include hibiscus or fenugreek tea
#becoming one of those people who spend hours drinking numerous
cups of tea under a tree while talking about ‘building the nation’
#you can spend hours ‘people-watching’
#ethiopian coffee, now *this* is life
#the local coffee, spiced with a lot of ginger- now *this*
is heavenly
#food from the local restaurant tastes way better than anything
you make when you are home
#not knowing how to speak the main language or mother-tongue
is shameful and a pity. in fact, since most people speak at least four
languages, nobody gets it.
# complaining about any and everything about this country
even though you realize you will never stop coming back, regardless.
